Maybe we're not for each other
by sakura.mist07
Summary: Letting go isn't easy. You have to hold onto your decision and never back down. Life is a battle. Something starts and something ends. And for me, The biggest battle I have ever done is letting go Natsume. I love him and that wouldn't change.


"Maybe we're not for each other"

_Oneshot_

"I know this is the part  
Where the end starts_"_

**(Mikan's POV)**

I was walking down in the city streets. Well, it's really cold right now. I mean, it's already winter and I fee lonely. Wonder why I'm lonely? Not only lonely, but I'm also confused. As you know, I have this boyfriend, he's Natsume Hyugga. He is the hottest male here in Japan, oh, but according to the news, he is the hottest and sexiest man alive in the whole world. How did that happen? I don't know. He's just 18 years old meaning I'm a year younger than him. Well, he has this captivating bloody crimson eyes and messy raven hair. He has a well toned body and considering he's 6'5. Plus, he's smart but mind you, he's not a nerd. But still, none of that are excuses for him to be given that title. You may think I'm jealous about that, well I admit I'm kind of. But I'm not jealous of fan girls, it's because he barely gives his time to me. Why?

Well, this is the answer. He's a rock band vocalist. He's too busy to meet me. When I first met him, he's not yet a vocalist because he's just 13 years old, I think. I was 15 years old when we started dating. Then he and he's friends planned to create a rock band. But he's ignorance of me started when they became really famous. That's when I was 16 years old. I find it hard to contact him and he's always on rehearsals and interviews. All of the people know that I'm his girlfriend. That's what makes me down more. If I am not, I wouldn't have this kind of life. But, I love him not because of his charms, but because I know what he really is. Also, we study in different school. I study at Seika Academy while he studies at Alice Academy. They are just the same, only I don't want to enroll there because he's there. How can I focus on my studies, right? My parents also don't want me to go there because of the same reason. But they like Natsume, it's only that my life will be complicated if I study there. Now, where am I going?

Right, I'm going to their concert. I really hate him. I mean, this is their biggest concert ever. And I am not even invited to the front seats by him. My father insisted me to just buy tickets for the VIP seats, but I don't want too. They knew about this but they told me that maybe he's just too busy and this is a part of a relationship. But heck, this isn't even right. I even heard he invited that Shouda Sumire but me, NO. If my mother didn't inform me, I wouldn't know about it. I even lied about knowing it when my mother asked me because I know that she might bombard me questions about why I don't know it? Or is I'm ignoring Natsume? Tch. I don't know what to do anymore. I found this stone in front of me and I kicked it really hard, thinking it's my oh-so-beloved dear boyfriend Natsume.

"Ow! Who threw that?" Oops, I think it just hit somebody. I then saw a permed green hair. It's the evil witch, Shouda Sumire.

"Tsk. Tsk. If it's not Natsume-kun's trash girlfriend. I wonder why you are walking?" She just looked at me with full disgust. She's with her friends. All of them are dressed-up. I really wanna puke right now. She looks like Medusa. She's wearing a black furry coat but I cans till see her gowns inside. I think it's a green tube long gown. It has emeralds in it and she's wearing a 4 inches high heels. Oh my gosh, her face is covered with too much make-up.

"Ha! I knew it. You're envious of me. Of course, I'm richer than you and," she paused for a while and eyed me from toe to head, "you're disgusting. I bet Natsume just agreed to become you're girlfriend because you hypnotized him. And now, you're threatening to him if he breaks up with you."

I still didn't answer. She continued, "Poor you. Just go back to your house and cry there. Try also to tell your mom to clean your face. Remind her too this, she should just tie you up in your old and disgusting area and your family should just rot there. Hahahaha!"

I can take if she insulted me. But my parents and my family, she's crossing out of the line. How dare she insult our family? Right, she knows I'm Mikan Sakura but she doesn't know how powerful our family is. Their family is lower than our class.

"You! How dare you insult my family?" I am really angry now.

"What? Gonna call the police and tell them to arrest me?" She and her friends laughed and looked like wicked fools.

"You'll regret this. Shouda!" I walked past her and ignored them.

You may think, why I am just walking? Well, I don't want to create a commotion. I don't want to be known as a spoiled rich kid. If I asked our driver to fetch me, for sure my parents will send one of our limousines. I have my own car but I can't drive yet. Maybe tomorrow I can. Why? I just remembered tomorrow is my birthday. Today's New Year Eve. Their concert is held at one of our concert halls. Basically, it will start in 30 minutes. I heard my phone ringing so I picked it up from my pocket and saw it was Hotaru.

"Hello?" I answered.

"_Where are you baka?" Okay, I think Hotaru's mad. She is the girlfriend of Ruka Nogi and she is my best friend. _

"Well.."

"_Well, what? You hurry up baka. We're waiting for you!"_

"Hotaru, I know. But, where's Natsume?" I asked her with worry.

"_Mikan, they are dressing up. Go here now." She answered me changing the topic._

"Okay, Okay. I'll be there. I'll just buy something."

"_Take care. Be sure to come here."_

"Yes Ma'am." I hanged up the phone and walked to a bakery. I saw mini cakes and I am tempted to buy it. I went inside and saw delicious cakes.

"Good Evening Ms. What do you want to buy?" A heard a boy asked me.

"Oh, Uhmm.. I want this please." I saw him get the cake and wrapped it in a nice box.

"Please give me a cup of coffee too." He nodded while I observed him. He prepared the both and handed it to me.

"That will be 5000 yen." I handed him the payment as I smiled to him and bowed.

I walked out of the bakery and started eating the cake. It's a strawberry-mocha cake. Well, it can be eaten without using fork so I started to eat it. As I was walking, I saw lovers in a restaurant. They were talking and enjoying their moment. I envy them. I really missed Natsume. He wouldn't be with me in my birthday. Last year too, he wasn't with me. I always celebrate my birthday alone.

I didn't notice I was already near the hall. I was till eating my food. I was in the opposite street as I stood still. I stared at the sign. There was their band. They are five all in all. The background was night. There is one Sakura tree and all you can see behind them are stars and the evening sky. Koko and Kitsuneme were standing side by side. Ruka is standing opposite them. Mochu is sitting on one of the branches. While Natsume, he is sitting and leaning on the tree. All of them are staring in front, but Natsume is staring intently. I hope I was the one he is thinking right there. They are all wearing black jeans. Koko and Kitsuneme were gray shirts. Only the prints were different. Koko has a black guitar while Kitsuneme has a white long sleeve inside. Ruka was wearing a navy blue checkered polo with all buttons open and he has white shirt inside. Mochu was wearing a black sleeveless jacket. Natsume is wearing a black fitting shirt and a white jacket opened. Beside them was the title "Warmth in the Winter". I then saw a white limousine. I noticed Shouda going in so I went there too.

She finally noticed me and raised a brow. "Why are you here? Shouldn't yo be in your filthy house?"

"Oh, didn't you know that yous shouldn't be here too. I just forgot the guards to remind." I saw her laugh when I said that.

"Who are you kidding Sakura? Me?"

"No one. But if you think I'm kidding you are free to go to the mental. Hahaha!" Okay, I really enjoy this. I saw her face already red and she called the guards.

"Guards!" She called them and I was smirking. She looked at me and smirked too.

"Arrest her. And ban her from this place." Now, that was the biggest mistake she ever did. Banning me from our own property.

"Oh, and you can tell my parents to burn this place too." I just saw Shouda and her friend's face horror. The guards look horrified too. One guard called the manager of the hall. Of course, I know him.

"Ha? Are you crazy? Guards, arrest her immediately." The guards looked at her like she's the one crazy. I saw then the manager step out of the place. When he saw me, he bowed rapidly as I signaled him to stop.

"Now, what happened here?" Shouda spoke immediately. "Please ban this disgusting dog from coming here." The manager thought that she was talking about one of her friends. So he ordered them to arrest the girl.

"No! Not her. Arrest Sakura!" The manager looked angry at her.

"Ms. Sakura, I'm sorry to interrupt your entrance. Please come in now. Your parents are already there." Ta manager said and Shouda looked insulted.

"Hey! What ar--" the manager stopped her from saying anything, "If you insult more Ms. Sakura one more time. We will send you to the court and your friends too."

"What? What authority does she have for you to say that?"

"The manager coughed slightly while the guards looked at her while preventing from laughing. He was about to speak when is topped him. "Let me." I told him.

"First of all, Shouda. We own this place. From the place you are stepping on until the one where you are going. Second, I have all the authority to command them. Get it?" Their faces clearly shown shock as I continue. "Don't worry, I will let you watch the concert. Ja! Oh, and don't forget, you'll be in the last row." I winked at them as I entered the hall. I saw people talking non-stop and fan girls.

My parents saw me and I can see they are flabbergasted. My mom hugged me as my father too. Okay, I am ready for this.

"Mikan, honey. Why on earth are you still wearing your uniform?" Mom asked me.

"Yes dear. You know that this is a major concert." Dad informed me.

"Well, I cam from school. I walked so I'm fine. Can we go now to the main hall?" I am really tired now. My parents nodded as they led me to hall. I remembered I have to meet Hotaru and the others so I excused myself first. I knew that they are in the backstage so I went first to the bathroom to fix myself.

As I was walking, I noticed that some fan girls looked at me. They look really prepared. While some people who know our family bowed to me as I smiled at them. When I reached the bathroom, I went in and fixed my self. I washed my face and searched my bag. I found my lip gloss and powder. I applied some and brushed my hair. I laid it down and put a clip on it. My face looks bright now unlike before. I am still wearing my uniform. Before I forgot, this is how my uniform looks like. I am wearing a white long sleeve with an olive brown necktie. It has the same color of my skirt which is 5 inches before my knees. It is a checkered one with black linings. The blouse has a pocket located in front of my left chest and it has a logo of our school. The necktie has a logo too. Our jacket is black one and it also has the logo of our school located on one of its pocket. My shoes is a black boots below my knees. I fixed my uniform as I went out of the bathroom. I noticed a little girl crying beside the wall so I went to her.

"Hello, why are you crying?" I asked the girl.

"We-well, I lost my mommy and d-daddy. I don't know where they are. Uwaaa!" She sobbed as she wiped her little eyes. I somehow remembered my self when I was still a little girl.

"Ne, don't worry. I'll help you find your mom and dad." I smiled at her as I held her hand.

"Re-really?"

"Yes. Now maybe they are also looking for you. Oh, I'm Sakura Mikan. You can call me Mikan-nee. And you are?" I asked her as she smiled widely handing out her hands to me.

"I am Rizukawa Michi. Nice to meet you Mikan-nee." I shaked her hands when I heard a woman call Michi.

"MICHI!"

"Mom?" she looked at the woman and I looked at her too.

"Oh, where did you go? I was looking for you." Her mother looked at me and bowed.

"Thank you Ms. Sakura. I am glad to finally meet you." she said.

"Oh, me too. Well, I guess I have to go now. Bye Michi." I smiled to them as I bowed and walked away.

In the backstage

"Hotaru!" I squealed when I saw her and the others. Their faces look astonished maybe because I was still in my unform.

"Baka! Why on earth are you still wearing your uniform?" She asked as I scratched my head nervously.

"Well, I just walked here. Anyway, where is Natsume?"

"They are still preparing. Let's go now before someone occupy our seats." Hotaru told me as Anna and Nonoko nodded.

"Ano, I am not sitting in the VIP seats. I didn't get a ticket. So I'll just watch from other seat." I told them. Hotaru looked aggravated.

"Why? Didn't Natsume invited you to the VIP seats?" Anna asked me and I said no. Nonoko looked at me confused.

"Nonoko, don't worry. I can still watch there. So let's go now." I told them and we went to the seats.

Concert

The concert already started. The crown is already going wild. I looked at Natsume but he seem not to see me. There are many banners and girls shouting "Natsume-sama, We love you!" or is it's not Natsume, it will be the other band members. Natsume look handsome as ever. I am so enticed by him. I am sitting in the fifth row. Everyone is really enjoying right now. But me, I can't even feel the enjoyment. All I do is look at Natsume and somehow, I feel sad. Something in me is telling me to do something I know that can change my whole life. Natsume, I know he put his whole effort in this concert. And I now know that I can't beat it. He loves music and his choice of industry.

I decided already. I can't take it any longer. I love him but I don't want to steal everything from him. So, after this concert, I'll do what I need to do. To free him is the best thing to do. But for now, I'll watch him and I hope he will see me.

I didn't notice they are already finish. Time passes by. Everything ends. I called him in his cellphone and he answered it immediately.

"Hello!" I greeted him.

"_Hey, where were you? I didn't see you." He asked me._

"Well, I'm in the fifth row. Can we talk later?"

"_Oh. Later? What for?_

"About something. So I'll meet you in the park later near this hall."

"_Uh, okay. Bye."_

"Bye." I bid goodbye to him too. I knew it. He didn't even see me. If he wanted to see me, he'll put me in the VIP seats. But I don't care about that. All I want is for us to clear up things.

Park

I am now staring at the Sakura tree where I agreed to become Natsume's girlfriend. I feel my eyes watering so I wiped it immediately. I can never believe that I have to end this right now. I heard footsteps so I turned around and I saw him. I hugged him immediately as he hugged me too. Suddenly, he kissed me and I kissed him back. God, I love his kisses and his warmth. We pulled away as I looked at him. I suddenly wished he didn't kiss him. It just made it more harder for me.

"Natsume. I want to talk to you."

"Yeah I know that. That's why you called me here." He told me while smirking.

"Le-Let's.." I stuttered as his face shown confusion.

"What? Let's what?" I know his getting what I want to tell him.

"Let's break-up." I finally told him.

"Why? Do you have another one?" He is completely angry right now.

"I don't have. But I can't compete with it." I closed my eyes as tiny crystals of water drop from them.

"You can't compete with what?" He shouted and I am completely sobbing right now.

"With your music. I feel completely out of place since you went to the music industry. Your ignorance of m makes me more lonely. You not even inviting me in your concert. Has it ever crossed you mind where I knew that you have this concert? You're always busy to notice me. You reje--? I stopped when he talked.

"So you're breaking up with me because I didn't invite you to our concert? Is that all? You could've said!"

"No. it's because you don't care about me anymore! Do you even know how much insults I take every time your fan girls see me. DO YOU THINK I'M HAPPY WITH IT? Yes, I'm happy that you are famous but I didn't know that it will be the reason of you forgetting me?" I cried out loud and he clenched his fists.

I continued, "I just take everything. I love you but I don't know if you still love me. On special occasions, where are you?Do you even remember that tomorrow is my birthday? Do you even remember our anniversary? Natsume, I don't want to let you go, but I have to do this. At first, I thought that we are strong but no. I always accept everything you do. Even the news. When I went to the concert, as I was watching you. I knew that was the part where our end starts. And this is where I have to let you go."

"Mikan, I'm sorry. I know you hate me now. I'm letting you go if that's what you want. _Goodbye." _He told me that before he went away. Is till love him but I know that he realized what he did. I fell onto my knees while crying and snow is already falling. I cried and cried but I can't take back what I said. Maybe my parents are looking for me right now. But right now, I'm happy and sad.

Letting go isn't easy. You have to hold onto your decision and never back down. Life is a battle. Something starts and something ends. And for me, The biggest battle I have ever done is letting go Natsume. I love him and that wouldn't change. But right now, I felt true happiness. True happiness for me right now is when I realized that I can't get anything I want in this crazy world.

~*~The End~*~


End file.
